I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Randomize
