So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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