thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
