glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
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