I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
