office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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