coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
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