Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Dick very happy bro
Randomize
