You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
We need to get me chipped asap
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Randomize