I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
