Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Randomize
