Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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