Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
