so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
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