You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
