Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Randomize
