It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
