I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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