Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize