I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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