let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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