I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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