So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
