I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
this is an emotional support booty call
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
