thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
