Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Randomize
