he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
How does one acquire holy water?
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Nobody cheats on THIS.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
