If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
