a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Randomize
