Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
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