Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
