Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
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