Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Randomize
