And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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