guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
