We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
