Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
