Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Randomize
