We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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