Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
