giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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