porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
