oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
