the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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