we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
