dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
