So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize