My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
