At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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