so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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