At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Randomize
